There’s a fear I have of a men’s only forum becoming a place to air our dirty laundry with a lack of follow-up in person.
I know that some have made friends through the forum, but that hasn’t been my experience. I don’t think I’ve ever had a discussion on the forums that has lead to personal involvement. In fact, almost the opposite (which I’m sure is part of my story 🙂 ). Meaning; when I’ve posted something, either in response to or an initial question, I’ve been responded to in a manner that makes me not want to engage the people here. This isn’t always the case, but more than I care, it has been.
I look at a good friend of mine, he used to post here all the time, having threads go past the 6-page mark, but now he doesn’t post ever because of how he’s been responded to in the past. Opening up a men’s forum where he can share his struggles is even a higher level of risk that, based on experiences, would be scary to take in fear that our brothers would handle the situation like dicks, by tromping around like a giant not watching out for villagers below, like people “doomed… to eat their own dung and to drink their own urine” ([url=http://www.gnpcb.org/esv/search/?q=2+Kings+18%3A27]2 Kings 18:27[/url]). That is to say; they act immaturely – not recognizing that truth not spoken in grace is foolishness in disguise.
Then there’s the guy who would use the men’s only as a place to talk about their stuff and not ever go to a friend because “Hey, I’m open and honest with every guy, why do I need friends?”
Lastly, what Shalome just posted [quote] Although I would HIGHLY suggest….implore….any such idea be somehow overseen by an elder or extremely level headed deacon.[/quote] reminds me of another reason: The level of moderator involvement would be much higher than in the general categories we have. Which brings me back to my main point of having interpersonal contact with others. What is the job of each man, whether it is through Community Groups or Recovery/Purity/Grace Groups, would be handed to a group of elders or deacons who care too much about our lives to be distracted from working on what they see as the most valuable ways of ministering to us. Instead of being a body that loves, serves and walks each other through change, we could become overly dependant on the leaders to do that for us.
Archived source: Blogger post BLOG-004 · original entry URL
