myspacebarisbroken (helpdesk ticket)

Them: Myspacebarisbrokenanditisimpossibletotype.Canyouhelpme?

Me: Where are you?

Them: I work from home, but [my husband] will be at Ballard in the morning . . . .

Me: Have him bring the computer if you can. I’ll see what I can do.

Them: Will do . . . Thanks! And my cell phone is xxx-xxx-xxxx. And by the way, [my husband] is the one who typed the original message with no spaces . . . imagine that!

Me: It's hard to imagine.

Next Day

Me: I’mhereandcanhelpyoufixthespacebar.

Husband: I had to leave quickly today and forgot to check with you about [my wife's]
computer. Can you give me the status? And what your favorite adult beverage?

Me: Well, my favorite adult beverage is whisky. Either that, or whiskey (to be honest, I like whisky better than whiskey).

As far as [her] computer. I don't have it. Where would I find it?

Husband: I left it on the desk where you are on Sundays. I looked and it was gone so I assumed you had picked it up. Oops.

Here is your whisky:












Me: I’m going to have to order a new keyboard from Dell. With the holiday, I won’t get it until sometime next week. Canshetypeallheremailsandstufflikethisfortheweekend?

That’s not whisky, this here’s a whisky:












Husband: Can you leave it in my office? I will pick it up tomorrow.

With that much whisky (illustrated in your e-mail below), [mywife]’swordswillallruntogetheranyway!

Thanks,

S

Holiday Rum Cake:

1 Tsp. Sugar
1 or 2 Quarts of Rum
1 Cup Dried Fruit
Brown Sugar
1 Tsp. Soda
1 Cup Butter
2 Large Eggs
1 Cup Baking Powder
3 Juiced Lemons
1 Cup of Nuts

Before starting, sample rum to check quality. Good, isn't it? Now proceed.
Select large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc.
Check rum again. It must be just right. To be sure rum is of proper quality, pour one level cup of rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat.
With electric mixer, beat 1 cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 seaspoon of thusar and beat again.
Meanwhile, make sure rum is still alrighty. Try another cup. Open second quart if necessary.
Add leggs, 2 cups of fried druit and beat til high. If druit gets stuck in beaters, pry loose with drewscriber.
Sample rum again, checking for tonscisticity.
Next, sift 3 cups pepper or salt (really doesn't matter).
Sample rum.
Sift 1/2 pint lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 bablespoon of brown sugar-or whatever color you can find. Wix mell. Grease oven. Turn cake pan to 350 gredees. Pour mess into boven and ake.
Check run again and bo to ged.

..ADN HALPIE HOLIGLAZE TWO YA'ALL!



Giant's can get addicted too.

Excuse me, miss? There seems to be a mistake. I believe I ordered the large Zippo. Hello!

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